Discovering myself as a chef

Lately,
diving into my background about my roots and where did I come from has been eye opening. To be candid, I thought I had a great childhood. Talking with a professional, realizing I had what seemed like a great childhood. I didn't I was brought up as the child that could be use to get sympathy or attention for a parent.  Its been a ground shaker to look back on everything and realize that most of my true self isn't there it was forced in the image of someone else.
    Now comes the time for self discovery, to succeed where I was suppose to be a failure. Where I have been portrayed as  the bad child, the selfish child/ adult, the one who tries and never will succeed, the kid that is only good as long as the parent gets the acolytes from their associates. I was a twin, my twin died at birth. I am the survivor. I do not want pity, I do not want people to feel sorry for me, I screwed up a lot growing up because I thought I had to make the parent happy or fail. I have lost many a friend for it. I can say I am sorry and didn't know better but I can't change the past. I can move forward and now learn from the past.
I have been binge watching Chef's Table on Netflix. I have truly found my calling. I am meant to feed people and make them happy. I want to experiment food and I want the best ingredients. I think farm to table needs to be revisited. That good food some come from the ground and be fresh. That people have the right to have good clean healthy food. That families should take the time to sit at a table, electronic free and have great flavorful food and have a conversation with each other. I aspire to be as OCD as Nancy Silverton, and have the fire like Blue Hill farm Chef, To create unique and decadent, flavorful food that pops when you see it and blows your mind when you taste it. I do this for me first, my children second and the people who eat the food last.

This journey may take years, but I hope you read with me as I go. Failure and success alike.  Failure is going to happen. I will create crappy dishes that just are not going to work, but its a step to the next production to make it better.

thank you for listening.

Blueberry Polenta Scones

Its been awhile since I have taken the time to sit down everyday and post something fun on here. I think with the new year coming of 2017 its time to get back into the habit of writing.

Update on Chef: I am just about done with my B.S degree and have been working in management to expand my horizons and learn to be a better boss. We have moved cross country again and are back in the high dessert country of Utah. Where life as usual is challenging with the climate and the population.

I have been doing a lot of Vegan and Vegetarian cooking. Love the Thug Kitchen Cookbooks. They put out a some great food. I have been slowly cooking my way through their books. I wanted to share this recipe with you. It is  theirs all the credit to them. As a non vegan/ vegetarian, I would have to put some kind of drizzle on it, but these are really good. I do use them quite a bit.

Brown Sugar Blueberry Polenta Scones
By Thug Kitchen

 makes 8 i usually  multiply this recipe by 3

1.5 cup whole wheat pastry flour or AP flour
1 cup cornmeal
1/3 cup brown sugar
1tbsp baking powder
1/2 tsp cinnamon
1/4 tsp salt
1 cup unsweetened almond milk
1/4 cup olive oil
2 tsp vanilla extract
3/4 cup blue berries fresh or frozen

Heat oven to 425 degrees F
Mix together flour, cornmeal, brown sugar, baking powder, cinnamon, and salt in a large bowl. In a separate bowl whisk together milk, oil, and vanilla.

Make a well in the center of the flour and pour in the milk mixture. Your going to do the biscuit mix. Mix until its combined but do not over mix.

Dump out on to a cutting board and press into a rectangle. About 1 1/2 " thick and 8" long. make sure you dust your cutting board with flour so the dough doesn't stick to it. Halve lenghtwise and then crosswise  into 2 inch wide scones. Brush with Almond milk then sprinkle with sugar.
Bake until they look golden on the bottom. 12-15 minutes.  Let them cool 10 minutes.

This is not a make ahead recipe. Use it the day you make it. they go really soft the longer they sit out.

I like serving them with chocolate hummus. Its seems like a weird combo but it works really well together.

I hope this to the first of many more writings to come

Happy Eating